two sided road.

every word you say confuses me.

you say you miss me but you're with someone?

what do i do? 

do you mean it as friend or do you mean it as more.

if you mean it as i friend i miss you as well, if you mean it as more...

i'm not sure what to say.

i like you a lot but i don't want to be with someone that can't figure out what they want.

i may possible could love you, but i think maybe we should be friends.

than again maybe we should be more...

you put confusion into my head more then anyone has before.

i wish i could read you, then maybe i would know what exactly you're trying to say.

as for now i will stay confused until you finally tell me exactly how you feel.

you already know how i feel, but that don't matter unless you feel the same.

being with someone is a two sided street.

if one of the people don't know what they want, that street can become complicated and not two sided anymore.

i've had that happen before and i don't want that again. 

so until your ready i will walk another road and maybe one day you'll walk down the same road with me.

-Sharon June

tattoo's

so since i can remember i've wanted a tattoo. 

but now i've realized jusst exactly what i want my first tattoo to be. 

and it's a decison between. 

 

b.e.l.i.e.v.e on my right wrist likke the one above minus the stars and maybe the font a bit different. 

er a flying music note behind my right ear jusst likke the one above.

i chose these two things because the both mean something to me.

the b.e.l.i.e.v.e on my right wrist because my grpanda always told mee to believe in not only myself but possibilities and of course the big man upstairs.  

the word BELIEVE has always held a little something in my heart. 

eveytime i've said it, it has been ferr deep reason, to help someone, er to even help myself. BELIEVE jusst likke my grandpa would always tell mee. 

Believe. 

i told my friend rilee today to believe in her self i also told her this...

prom is a bit away dear, trusst mee i get it, i've NEVER been good enough to even been THOUGHT of let alone be asked to not even ONE school dance. and it kills mee, so yea i get it ya feel ugly and you want to be beautiful and you want to be the on everyone wants. i get it i do. youu jusst gotta realize that yerr beatiful no matter what, yerr uhhmazing no matter what, yerr gonna find someone no matter what, youu are going to go go far as long as you believe. you jusst got to be willing to wait and be patient and most importantly belive and it will come to youu it will. jusst believe it will. and it will. believe it then youu'll see it. [:

the flying music note behind my right ear is because of my daddi.

he has always taught me that music is an uhhmazing and a beautiful thing.

he has taught me everything about music about learning to love music. 

he is the reason music runs deep in these veins of mine. 

music will always be a passion of mine. and i havve figured this outt.

music is what gets mee threw the dayy music is what helps mee realieve my stress. 

and whyy not jusst a plan music note... because a flying music note to me represents the power to fly with music. 

meaning your dreams. in order to fight for your dreams and strive to get there ya gotta be willing to fly... that might not makke sense to youu but it sure does makke perfect sense to mee...

i've jusst been thinkking about that all dayy. 

i can't wait to get these two tattoo's because not onlyy will they mean something to mee.

they'll be a memory of myy grandpa john clark. that imiss so much. and without him, i wouldn't have been able to believe in myself and go threw the dayys. even though how much i jusst want to give up he won't let me yet. and i know he's watching over me from up above..  [:

and myy daddi bernard bell II that means the world to mee. without him i couldn't get threw the day, without him i would have music in myy life [: i thankk youu ferr that. daddi. he's not gone yet, but i know some day he will and i'll always havve that tattoo to remember how much he's taught mee in life. and how much he ment to mee... an thats whyy i want these two tattoos. [:

this post made mee cryy a llot but it's true i lovve these man so very much. 

one is missed each and every day i'm living and breathing.

and the other is the man that keeps mee breathing todayy. 

i dedicate this post to youu two. [:

new years. [:

i know i'm 17 days late.

but my new years was awesome.

brought it in with backstreet boys and new kids on the block. haha. 

mee and myy sister drank fuzzy navels or as she likes to call them fuzzy crotches. 

whyy anyone would want to drink a fuzzy crotch i have no idea.. haha.

we also had some shots of tequila and some jagger. 

and my new years kiss was this special boy...

although he didn't have that corn dog on his nose. haha.

his name is tavin james he's my nephew and he's the cuttiest thing in the world. 

he ran up to mee and goes happi new years! it was cutte. [:

anywayz i haven't decided on a new years resolution as soon as i decide i'll let ya know. haha

but i've decided this year is going to be a great year. 

i couldn't have brought it in with anyone better. [: 

i lovve myy sister and her familyy.! <3

ohh and this year is gonna be diffrent cause i'm gonna look different i'm dying my hair.![:

i'm dying it likke this... 

i'm excitedd! i can't wait. [: gonna lookk likke a new women. 

anywayz i hope yerr new years was as great as mine. :D

if not then i'm sorri yerr life must suckk. haha 

jusst kidding. [:

untitled.

here's to the broken hearted, to the sad endings, the painful breakups,and the hard regrets.

we all love you even though no matter how much we deny we do, we always will.

it's like as if we love the the pain, as if it's our kryptonite and we're superman.

we can't help but to love, and crave it.

we all just need to realize that you're no good for us and never will be, so we can learn from our mistakes.

so we can realize we need to love ourselves before we can every love another.

the hardest part of that is learning to see ourselves like others that love us do.

if only we knew how then we could break the spell to all this pain, and heartache.

but if only... if only...

-Sharon June

this is exactly how i feel about love. that if we don't know how to love ourselves than we'll never be able to love another not only that but if we could see ourselves the way other people do it would be so much easier to fall in love and you know mabye thats a good thing... idk. but i do know the hardest part of being in love is being in love with someone that isn't in love back, but will always hold yerr heart. it's never easy. and never will be... 

deuces

exactly how i feel about him now... i want to hate him. but this is how i feel about him. i do say deuces this time to him. screw him. he cheated on me and used him so deuces youu douche bagg.




Deuces Lyrics

All that bullshit's for the birds
You aint nothin but a vulture
Always hopin for the worst
Waiting for me to fuck up 
You’ll regret the day when I find another girl, yeah
Who knows just what I need, she knows just what I mean
When I tell her keep it drama free
Ohohohohohohohoh… x2(Chuckin up them(deuces)
I told you that im leaving (deuces)
I know you mad but so what?
I wish you best of luck
And now im finna throw them deuces up

[Chorus]
Im on some new shit
Im chuckin my deuces up to her
Im moving on to something better, better, better
No more tryin to make it work
You made me wanna say bye bye, say bye bye, say bye bye to her [x2]

[Tyga Verse]
Uh, Use to be valentines
Together all the time
Thought it was true love, but you know women lie
Its like I sent my love with a text two times
Call cause I care but I aint get no reply
Tryna see eye to eye but its like we both blind
Fuck it lets hit the club, i rarely sip but pour me some
Cause when its all said and done,
I aint gon be the one that she can always run to
I hate liars, fuck love Im tired of tryin
My heart big but it beat quiet
I don’t never feel like we vibin
Cause every time we alone its a awkward silence
So leave your keys on the kitchen counter
And gimme back that ruby ring with the big diamond
Shit is over, whatchu trippin for?
I don’t wanna have to let you go
But baby I think its better if I let you know

[Chorus]
Im on some new shit
http://www.elyricsworld.com/deuces_lyrics_chris_brown.html
Im chuckin my deuces up to her
Im moving on to something better, better, better
No more tryin to make it work
You made me wanna say bye bye, say bye bye, say bye bye to her [x2]

[K Mc verse]
Look, my shorty always on some bullshit like Chicago
So I flip that middle finger and the index finger follow
Deuces, we aint got no future in tomorrow
I’m a dick, so it shouldn’t be that hard to swallow
The other chick Im with never complain
She make wanna leave the one im with Usher Raymond
Probably didn’t register, don’t trip, later on it will
Shorty full of drama like gangsta grizzles
I finally noticed it, it finally hit me
Like Tina did Ike in the limo, it finally hit me
I got a new chick, and she aint you
She paula patton thick She give me déjà vu
And all that attitude, I don’t care bout it
But all that shit I do for her, you gon hear bout it
Breezy rep two up, two down
But im just puttin two up, chuckin up the deuce now

[Chorus]
Im on some new shit
Im chuckin my deuces up to her
Im moving on to something better, better, better
No more tryin to make it work
You made me wanna say bye bye, say bye bye, say bye bye to her [x2]

untitled.

watching you go isn't an easy thing to do.

even though i know it's not forever.

i fear it could be.

that you'll never come back.

i shouldn't fear that but it's hard not to when every other time, you've walked out and you don't come back.

i love you so much and if you were to walk about again i wouldn't know what to do.

sitting in my window missing you already when you just barely left.

i know it's not like we're broken up, you're just moving out. 

but it's still hard. 

i can barley sleep without you.

i don't even want to breathe without you let alone not be by you.

waking up to you not being there is hard.

rolling over in the middle of the night and not feeling you there kills me.

i miss you baby.

and i hope your not walking out for good.

i just hope that you come back even though we can't live together.

trust me i hate this as much as you do, well as much as i think you do. 

i'm going to try to sleep now, but without you here it's going to be hard...

without you holding me at night, without you to wake up to in the morning to. 

but who knows this might help our relationship grow. 

i really hope it does. 

well goodnight babe wherever you are i hope you know i love you and wish you were here tonight.

-Sharon June.

skinny bitch.

i saw a book with the title to that the other day and it got me thinking about society and how fucked up it is now a days.

how does one have confidence in them self when they can't even look in the mirror without being disgusted by the way they look?

now a days all girls wanna be like stick figure bitches. 

i don't get it.

i thought you'd at least want some curve, no people look at my body and they're like wow she's fat.

society now a days is so fucked up. 

ya know back in the day the bigger you were the more beautiful you were and well off. 

i think it's so funni that no a days it's like yerr more beautiful when you look like you haven't eaten in days.

it's ridiculous. 

most girls now are so self conscious because it's like oh if yerr not skinny like all the actresses and model's then you're not beautiful. 

fuck that!

there is more to beauty then jusst the outside. 

i'm so done with ppl telling other ppl they should diet and they should try to loose weight.

it's bullshit.

i mean i even fall for this bullshit all the time, how are we girls suppose to be happi with our bodies when everyone around us and the media is shoving it down our throats that we have to skinnier than we are.

i have had an eating disorder because of this stupid sheet. 

it makes you feel ugly, fat, and dumb. 

and like you'll never get any guy...

when we shouldn't listen to the media but us girls do do that. 

it's not even just girls it's guys too. 

it's ridiculous!

i hate media sometimes because of this reason alone.

i have sat there and said it to myself that i'm just a fat dumb ugly person. 

when i'm not. 

i'm just letting the media and all these ppl in the world now get to me because they're stick skinny and i'm not. i have curves. 

but you know what i'd rather have curves then be some girl who looks like she hasn't eaten in days... somedays. 

some other days i really don't want to be the size that i am. 

i don't even want to look at myself. 

but maybe thats because of all you ppl outt there that do this to us. 

and it's not fair. 

i mean diet sure whatever but don't destroy yerr body becasue you want a boy to like you more, er because you want to look like the girls in the magzines now a days. no. 

i'd rather be like the old models's like betty page. she had curves and she was still a beautiful women. [:
i know i still have issues with my body and you know what thats perfectly normal, when i start doing something drastic to change my body thats when it's a problem. 

that my two cents on this stupid topic. [:

thank you for reading.